You're completely useless in the revolution.
Apparently you make a good broom.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
