Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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