i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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