Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
