Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize