I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
