butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
