I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
