We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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