Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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