I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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