My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
How's work?
Spinning.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
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