What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
