she sounds like chewbacca in bed
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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