Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
