dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Randomize
