she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
