Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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