Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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