you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
