I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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