She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
