i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
