u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize