Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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