Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
