went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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