ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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