can we get nightvision for the apartment?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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