But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
