but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
