You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
