it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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