Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize