This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
