Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
