I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
