physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
