You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I have feelings that need drinking.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
