Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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