My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
