man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
