Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
