so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
