I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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