What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Come see our sink grown plant.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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