You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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