you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
You dont lie about slip and slides
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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