So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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