For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Randomize
